“Can't I fly helicopters AND be an oceanographer who writes songs and stories AND cooks jolly good foods that taste like a glory?”
Says I, an ENFP.
Says I, an ENFP.
Wednesday, September 9, 2015
Sunday, January 19, 2014
Padan muka
Turn to Allah first! Then resort to everything else.
But you?
It's the other way round.
so padanlah muka engkau!
1915 hrs
Jan 19, 2014
But you?
It's the other way round.
so padanlah muka engkau!
1915 hrs
Jan 19, 2014
Monday, December 30, 2013
The Never Ending Life Of A Doormat
I have such a pathetic life. People don't even care about me and easily take me for granted. I foolishly dedicate my life to people that I very much care about but in return these people ignore me. Forget me and leave me waiting day by day at the door.
A door mat. Very useful but only used when it's needed and abandoned when it's already used. An item often forgotten by many, loyally giving it's service, it's function to clean the dirty feet which in fact is a very important thing.
But some people just do not know how to appreciate the door mat. "It's just a door mat for god's sake!" They say.
"A door mat that is dirty!" They added.
"Why should we even appreciate dirty things? It will only clutter our mind. Just don't bother worrying about something that does not even mean something to you"
But hey! Remember if it's not important why did you even buy a doormat in the first place? Why is it the first thing you approach when you get home? Why is it the first thing that welcomes you to 'home sweet home'?
It is ironic to think about who makes the doormat an item that is dirty, filthy and abandoned? It is people and their dirty soiled feet that go in and out each day, scrubbing, wiping, stepping on the doormat making it changed. Being stepped on, rubbed on day in day out changed the doormat mentally and physically.
It becamed stained, it looks horrible. It looks worn out and miserable. It felt like giving up. "Why am I doing this to myself?" Asked the doormat to itself. "People treat me like they don't like me. Like I have no use. Like I am an unwanted item that doesn't even have any function!Why do I lie still by the door waiting?"
Silence---
The doormat found the answer. "Cleanliness is one of important aspects in Islam." There doormat! You found your answer. A doormat DOES matter in Islam. It is to ease people's life. To provide happiness and cleanliness.
Why should you be sad? You might not be appreciated by many but think about what you're contributing, it's plenty!
So the doormat kept waiting. Lying still by the door each day to be stepped on. Wiped on. Scrubbed on. Stained on. Helplessly lying still with nothing much to do but to hope that it is given the courage, the patience, determination and persistence to live it's live as a doormat.
And today. Again, I see the doormat foolishly, shamelessly, endlessly waiting to enjoy the suffer of being stepped on by people's soiled feet.
"I'll wait. I'll be here for as long as I live because I know I am making a difference in people's life. I make it better for them and I'll keep being here for as long as I'm needed until one day I became worst and dysfunctional to people and they throw me out."
Good luck doormat. May you be given the courage and strength. To love people who treat you bad. To live your life as a doormat.
Monday
30/12/2013
1945hrs
Saturday, December 28, 2013
Sleep over
I wish I could just sleep over my problems. Just like some people do. -- but I can't.
The issues are not going to go away. There are even more problems to stay.
Denial makes people go crazy at times. Like it or not we live in a world that comes with people around us.
Not green creatures with round bobbly head who perhaps has no emotions.
There are real living people around us--
With feelings, emotions, preferences all in commotion. So deal with it.
If you can't make it easier don't add the burden. Period.
Dec 28,2013
9.32am
Thursday, December 12, 2013
Friday, August 9, 2013
Commotion
Commotion.
lost in directions,
struggle with emotions,
stumbled upon obstacles,
hoping for miracles.
miracles?--
does it even exist?
well--
not unless you become persistent and push away all the reluctants.
the negatives and hesitations.
in your mind. in your head--
and start doing it right.
and fight.
or else--
you'll keep losing in directions.
you'll sink in your own commotion.
Friday, April 19, 2013
It ain't easy
Yes, becoming parents is one of the most wonderful things anyone could ever experience in life. But I must say; it ain't easy. 'Wonderful' to me is just a one word to describe 'challenging', 'enlightening', 'frustrating', 'uplifting', 'thought provoking', 'devastating', 'fulfilling', 'excruciating', 'amazing' and what not.
It's a journey of self discovery that I find through the eyes of my children. I took the I in M'I'NE and I put it into THE'I'RS. I took the 'U' in YO'U' and I added it into 'U'S. I took the 'E' in M'E' and I happily turned it into W'E'
No matter how hard and how impossible it may sound, selfish just cannot be in any parent's life diary. You just gotta sell the fish and becomes fishless! lol
Oh, what have I blabbered about? ;D
It's a journey of self discovery that I find through the eyes of my children. I took the I in M'I'NE and I put it into THE'I'RS. I took the 'U' in YO'U' and I added it into 'U'S. I took the 'E' in M'E' and I happily turned it into W'E'
No matter how hard and how impossible it may sound, selfish just cannot be in any parent's life diary. You just gotta sell the fish and becomes fishless! lol
Oh, what have I blabbered about? ;D
Tuesday, March 5, 2013
Continental Cars Repair & Service Centre (Mercedes Benz, BMW, Audi, VW) | 88DB Malaysia
Now, for those of you who are in need of reliable, affordable but high quality auto service centre, you might wanna check this out :)
DR n DEEN AUTOTECH is Bumiputra Continental Cars Auto Service Centre, facilitated in a two-lot factory building, the auto service centre is equipped with high tech equipments with advanced technology, latest diagnostic scan tools and software update (MB Star & ISID) handled by highly trained auto professionals.
The auto workshop offers cleanliness and comfort in its facility as well as reliable and honest service which is quite rare in the automotive industry. Why don't you have a peek at their blog http://drndeenautotech.blogspot.com/ or just drop by at 39 & 40, Jalan S2C2, Green Technology Park, Seremban, N.Sembilan. Or contact them at 06-6016105/ 012-7484952 for your repair and service needs.
Oh, btw, here's the link to their online advert;
Continental Cars Repair & Service Centre (Mercedes Benz, BMW, Audi, VW) | 88DB Malaysia
DR n DEEN AUTOTECH is Bumiputra Continental Cars Auto Service Centre, facilitated in a two-lot factory building, the auto service centre is equipped with high tech equipments with advanced technology, latest diagnostic scan tools and software update (MB Star & ISID) handled by highly trained auto professionals.
The auto workshop offers cleanliness and comfort in its facility as well as reliable and honest service which is quite rare in the automotive industry. Why don't you have a peek at their blog http://drndeenautotech.blogspot.com/ or just drop by at 39 & 40, Jalan S2C2, Green Technology Park, Seremban, N.Sembilan. Or contact them at 06-6016105/ 012-7484952 for your repair and service needs.
Oh, btw, here's the link to their online advert;
Continental Cars Repair & Service Centre (Mercedes Benz, BMW, Audi, VW) | 88DB Malaysia
Thursday, January 24, 2013
Table manners
My kids and I were having late lunch at the dining table. Told them off for kicking each other under the table. "Guys! Where's your manners? You should behave well when eating y'know!" so I said.
They stopped.
Silent.
Out of a sudden. Extreme 'PROOOT!" sound.
My eldest son went "Mummy!! Where's your table manners?!"
And so we laugh.
Footnote: Parents are no saint. So do kids.
January 24,2013
1838hrs
They stopped.
Silent.
Out of a sudden. Extreme 'PROOOT!" sound.
My eldest son went "Mummy!! Where's your table manners?!"
And so we laugh.
Footnote: Parents are no saint. So do kids.
January 24,2013
1838hrs
A football team. A family.
It's impossible to form a football team without its players.
It's impossible to achieve the team's target without guidance from its superiors.
It's impossible for the team to perform their best without strategy.
It's impossible to succeed without strength and energy.
Determination and persistent.
Will and confidence.
It's impossible for the team to be at the top of the league, without supports, motivations, cheers and 'GOAL!!' shrieks.
It's impossible to play their game without the field to showcase their fame.
It's impossible to carry one mission without team work in mind, because in a team you need to pretend like everyone is blind.
There'll be differences, arguments, tantrums and grunts. But as long as everyone understands, everthing will work fine.
A football team. A family.
They're not much different. They're the same entity.
January 24,2013
1608hrs
It's impossible to achieve the team's target without guidance from its superiors.
It's impossible for the team to perform their best without strategy.
It's impossible to succeed without strength and energy.
Determination and persistent.
Will and confidence.
It's impossible for the team to be at the top of the league, without supports, motivations, cheers and 'GOAL!!' shrieks.
It's impossible to play their game without the field to showcase their fame.
It's impossible to carry one mission without team work in mind, because in a team you need to pretend like everyone is blind.
There'll be differences, arguments, tantrums and grunts. But as long as everyone understands, everthing will work fine.
A football team. A family.
They're not much different. They're the same entity.
January 24,2013
1608hrs
Saturday, January 12, 2013
Just when you think
Just when you think you're a chain with just one link.
Something comes and connects you to the rest of the world.
Januari 12,2013
0959hrs
Something comes and connects you to the rest of the world.
Januari 12,2013
0959hrs
Saturday, January 5, 2013
The person
Just when we think there's no more hope and trust in mankind. There will always be one person who would raise up our faith in humanity. Thanks for being the one.
And thanks for being the one to ruin it too. As always ;)
05 January,2013
1637hrs
05 January,2013
1637hrs
Friday, January 4, 2013
New year that's not so new
What's so new about new year?
Same old countdown.
Same old fireworks.
Same old cheers and laughters.
Same old foods and drinks.
Same old gazillion people gathering.
Same old celebration.
Time to tone it down and focus more on new year's resolution.
"Happy new year old style!"
January 01, 2013
0015hrs
Same old countdown.
Same old fireworks.
Same old cheers and laughters.
Same old foods and drinks.
Same old gazillion people gathering.
Same old celebration.
Time to tone it down and focus more on new year's resolution.
"Happy new year old style!"
January 01, 2013
0015hrs
Dare to fail
I dared my self to fail.
And I failed the JPJ on road test.
Sucks big time!! But will retest.
See you again on January 10th you big road bully!
December 27,2013
1347hrs
And I failed the JPJ on road test.
Sucks big time!! But will retest.
See you again on January 10th you big road bully!
December 27,2013
1347hrs
Friday, December 28, 2012
Monday, December 24, 2012
Big 1-0
10 is a great number. It's a beginning of a decade. It shows longevity. It shows maturity. It shows connectivity. It shows continuity.
But 10 is also a complicated number. Made up of number 1 and 0, it is the starter for bigger two digit numbers, yet it consists of 0 and 1; smallest numbers there is.
To make up a big number it needs the small ones. To build up a happy, lasting marriage with big numbers; it needs the small unidentified things; the talk, the walk, the pinch, the toss, the call, the pat on the back, the silent, the noise, the laughter, the sadness, the smile and craziness.
The stare, the frown, the challenge, the fight and tears; all of which are important. Small unidentified things that are fairly seen as unimportant but those small things are what makes a marriage unified.
Our marriage is not all bed of roses because we do sleep on the bed of thorns once in a while to keep us on the ground but that's what makes up our number for today. Happy 10th anniversary and hoping to explore more numbers with you if I may say! :)
Alhamdulillah.
1651hrs
December 23, 2012
But 10 is also a complicated number. Made up of number 1 and 0, it is the starter for bigger two digit numbers, yet it consists of 0 and 1; smallest numbers there is.
To make up a big number it needs the small ones. To build up a happy, lasting marriage with big numbers; it needs the small unidentified things; the talk, the walk, the pinch, the toss, the call, the pat on the back, the silent, the noise, the laughter, the sadness, the smile and craziness.
The stare, the frown, the challenge, the fight and tears; all of which are important. Small unidentified things that are fairly seen as unimportant but those small things are what makes a marriage unified.
Our marriage is not all bed of roses because we do sleep on the bed of thorns once in a while to keep us on the ground but that's what makes up our number for today. Happy 10th anniversary and hoping to explore more numbers with you if I may say! :)
Alhamdulillah.
1651hrs
December 23, 2012
Arms for each other
No flowers, no gifts no nothing because what we have is enough; arms for each other to cling. Happy big 1-0 to me and hubby :)
Alhamdulillah.
December 24, 2012
1613hrs
Alhamdulillah.
December 24, 2012
1613hrs
Saturday, December 22, 2012
Constipation
With all these social media I'm being overly fed with excessive information. I'm constipated.
22122012
1110hrs
22122012
1110hrs
Tuesday, December 11, 2012
Smoking doesn't kill. Ignorance does.
Smoking doesn't kill. Ignorance does. Yes, as cliche as it may sound but that's the sad truth.
Most people probably started smoking in their teenage years but sadly there are people who started way earlier innocently thinking that it's all about being the coolest ones. With cigarette in hand puffing the hazardous smoke in and out. Sooner than you think it became your addiction and voila! It's hard to turn back unless you have a strong will to quit and you keep educating yourself about health so you can put ignorance to a big full stop.
Ignorance is not a bliss. Ignorance is a blister that causes more damage, wound and pain to the smokers and people around them. What brought my attention to post something related to smoking is what has been going on in my family. My own beloved family.
................
All my life as a mother, I have been trying to get rid of all the bad habits and the negative attitudes I had prior to being a mother. I battled with my temperament, my selfishness, my recklessness and other endless flaws. Alhamdulillah I think I managed to tone them down and still battling hard.
As much as I try hard to be a good example to my naive children, there were times when I lost in my own battle and fall rock bottom. But most importantly I don't give up and I keep trying to be better and will never stop InsyaAllah. I think the key is to keep trying and never stop. Even when it's the moment where you can no longer stand up, just push yourself harder for good.
The same with smoking and trying to quit. Once you picked up the habit it's hard to stop but it's even harder if you don't have the will and the knowledge on why do you need to stop.
My husband is an avid smoker and been one throughout half of his 30 years of life. He was a great athlete back in high school representing the country in Cricket and eventhough smoking is one negative factor in his sports performance he's still succumbed to the habit and his loyalty to cigarettes remains till now, even with three kids around.
I will keep motivating him to quit hoping that one day he'll realize that smoking doesn't actually give him any goodness but deteriorating health and ashes of burnt money. Besides, being a parent is all about showing a good example and not just talking about it. And that goes to both sides ;)
Despite being around smokers all the time, I will continuously educate my children on the negative sides of smoking to ensure they know and able to think wisely for themselves. My principle in parenting is easy. We teach the children about moral and good values while we can so when they grow up they're equipped to choose what's best for them. Whether or not they're choosing the best option doesn't lie in our hands but we must equip them with what's needed in their life. Once we've put in our best effort in raising them, all we do is just sit back, watch them grow and support them all the way with prayers and love.
One of the things I like to do with the kids is whenever we saw a poster on 'no smoking' campaign, I'll read it loud to them and explain in whatever ways they could understand. I emphasize on the negative effects of smoking on one's life from the aspect of health, financial, sosial, physical and etc.
Thank God they're brilliant kids and they know how to utilized the knowledge they earned. Everytime Daddy or Atuk and Uncles tried to smoke they'll be the alarm detector saying "Jangan!" At times they'll add things like "Ada pencuci toilet dalam rokok!, ada urine dalam rokok! Ada shieldtox dalam tu!"
I just looked at the kids feeling sorry for their effort being ignored and just blown away by the smokes.
As an adult, is this how we're suppose to react to the kids who are trying hard on taking the role to educate parents, grandparents, uncles and aunties. Poor little children. I understand how frustrated you must be but I admire your courage and determination for speaking up and for being consistent in helping out to educate your family about smoking. Thanks kiddos! Mummy salute all three of you; Daniel, Alyssa and Dhani :)
One incident that left great impact to me was when we went back to 'In Laws' house in Rembau. As usual they were playing outside the house while others and I were busy eating the ripe bright yellow and striking red rambutans.
I could see they were busy shovelling the pile of sand just under the rambutan tree. I thought they were just having fun playing with dirts and sands so I told them to play quickly and get inside to clean themselves up. But when my husband came out of room in panic looking for his ciggie, I knew the kids were up to something and in my opinion they were doing the right thing.
Husband asked "Did you see my cigarette box anywhere?" "Nope!" I answered firmly. He then asked "Dhani, Alyssa did you happen to play with my cigarette box?"
They replied "We have no idea" "Is it not in your hand?" Dhani added while their facial expression were showing some kind of hidden agenda. I knew it. They buried Daddy's cigarette box inside the pile of sand. Oh well, I'd rather they do that than burying their father's dead body who lost a battle with cigarette. Same goes to my eldest son, every time he found Daddy's ciggie box, he'll come up to me and asked "Mummy, is it ok?" for approval to throw away the cigarettes. As usual I would always nod to assure he's taking the right action. Smoking is just as wasteful as throwing it away right? So if you don't wanna waste, don't buy it at all.
I could see how much effort they've been putting to stop Daddy from smoking and from the determination they portray, I could sense they're no where near to giving up. Sometimes Dhani gets confused on the mixed messages between Daddy and Mummy; he pretends to smoke using a pencil and I feel bad seeing that. I feel helpless. My kids are helpless. Only smokers can help themselves to quit smoking and help others to feel less helpless in helping them to quit.
To smokers; 'please help yourself and let others help you in trying to quit'. Stop being ignorant and start educating yourselves. This issue isn't about how cute and clever the kids get when they try to stop you from smoking. It is about us being a clever responsible adult feeding the kids with moral and good values but practicing the contradictory. Now THAT is the real issue!
My post today is mainly to remind myself; a parent with great responsibilities on my shoulders and even the emphasize is more on smoking issue, it can be applied in many aspects of our life as an adult.
To my kids; You guys are my greatest heros. If one day you're in a junction to choose between taking the ciggie your friend offered you or turning down the offer, I'd just pray and hope that you would remember back the day you buried your dad's box of cigarette.
Be proud on your effort to save the lives of your loved ones and be proud to save your life too.
To hubby; I honestly believe in your success being departed with cigarettes sooner or later. Just don't ever ever give up.
1231hrs
Dec 11, 2012
Most people probably started smoking in their teenage years but sadly there are people who started way earlier innocently thinking that it's all about being the coolest ones. With cigarette in hand puffing the hazardous smoke in and out. Sooner than you think it became your addiction and voila! It's hard to turn back unless you have a strong will to quit and you keep educating yourself about health so you can put ignorance to a big full stop.
Ignorance is not a bliss. Ignorance is a blister that causes more damage, wound and pain to the smokers and people around them. What brought my attention to post something related to smoking is what has been going on in my family. My own beloved family.
................
All my life as a mother, I have been trying to get rid of all the bad habits and the negative attitudes I had prior to being a mother. I battled with my temperament, my selfishness, my recklessness and other endless flaws. Alhamdulillah I think I managed to tone them down and still battling hard.
As much as I try hard to be a good example to my naive children, there were times when I lost in my own battle and fall rock bottom. But most importantly I don't give up and I keep trying to be better and will never stop InsyaAllah. I think the key is to keep trying and never stop. Even when it's the moment where you can no longer stand up, just push yourself harder for good.
The same with smoking and trying to quit. Once you picked up the habit it's hard to stop but it's even harder if you don't have the will and the knowledge on why do you need to stop.
My husband is an avid smoker and been one throughout half of his 30 years of life. He was a great athlete back in high school representing the country in Cricket and eventhough smoking is one negative factor in his sports performance he's still succumbed to the habit and his loyalty to cigarettes remains till now, even with three kids around.
I will keep motivating him to quit hoping that one day he'll realize that smoking doesn't actually give him any goodness but deteriorating health and ashes of burnt money. Besides, being a parent is all about showing a good example and not just talking about it. And that goes to both sides ;)
Despite being around smokers all the time, I will continuously educate my children on the negative sides of smoking to ensure they know and able to think wisely for themselves. My principle in parenting is easy. We teach the children about moral and good values while we can so when they grow up they're equipped to choose what's best for them. Whether or not they're choosing the best option doesn't lie in our hands but we must equip them with what's needed in their life. Once we've put in our best effort in raising them, all we do is just sit back, watch them grow and support them all the way with prayers and love.
One of the things I like to do with the kids is whenever we saw a poster on 'no smoking' campaign, I'll read it loud to them and explain in whatever ways they could understand. I emphasize on the negative effects of smoking on one's life from the aspect of health, financial, sosial, physical and etc.
Thank God they're brilliant kids and they know how to utilized the knowledge they earned. Everytime Daddy or Atuk and Uncles tried to smoke they'll be the alarm detector saying "Jangan!" At times they'll add things like "Ada pencuci toilet dalam rokok!, ada urine dalam rokok! Ada shieldtox dalam tu!"
I just looked at the kids feeling sorry for their effort being ignored and just blown away by the smokes.
As an adult, is this how we're suppose to react to the kids who are trying hard on taking the role to educate parents, grandparents, uncles and aunties. Poor little children. I understand how frustrated you must be but I admire your courage and determination for speaking up and for being consistent in helping out to educate your family about smoking. Thanks kiddos! Mummy salute all three of you; Daniel, Alyssa and Dhani :)
One incident that left great impact to me was when we went back to 'In Laws' house in Rembau. As usual they were playing outside the house while others and I were busy eating the ripe bright yellow and striking red rambutans.
I could see they were busy shovelling the pile of sand just under the rambutan tree. I thought they were just having fun playing with dirts and sands so I told them to play quickly and get inside to clean themselves up. But when my husband came out of room in panic looking for his ciggie, I knew the kids were up to something and in my opinion they were doing the right thing.
Husband asked "Did you see my cigarette box anywhere?" "Nope!" I answered firmly. He then asked "Dhani, Alyssa did you happen to play with my cigarette box?"
They replied "We have no idea" "Is it not in your hand?" Dhani added while their facial expression were showing some kind of hidden agenda. I knew it. They buried Daddy's cigarette box inside the pile of sand. Oh well, I'd rather they do that than burying their father's dead body who lost a battle with cigarette. Same goes to my eldest son, every time he found Daddy's ciggie box, he'll come up to me and asked "Mummy, is it ok?" for approval to throw away the cigarettes. As usual I would always nod to assure he's taking the right action. Smoking is just as wasteful as throwing it away right? So if you don't wanna waste, don't buy it at all.
I could see how much effort they've been putting to stop Daddy from smoking and from the determination they portray, I could sense they're no where near to giving up. Sometimes Dhani gets confused on the mixed messages between Daddy and Mummy; he pretends to smoke using a pencil and I feel bad seeing that. I feel helpless. My kids are helpless. Only smokers can help themselves to quit smoking and help others to feel less helpless in helping them to quit.
To smokers; 'please help yourself and let others help you in trying to quit'. Stop being ignorant and start educating yourselves. This issue isn't about how cute and clever the kids get when they try to stop you from smoking. It is about us being a clever responsible adult feeding the kids with moral and good values but practicing the contradictory. Now THAT is the real issue!
My post today is mainly to remind myself; a parent with great responsibilities on my shoulders and even the emphasize is more on smoking issue, it can be applied in many aspects of our life as an adult.
To my kids; You guys are my greatest heros. If one day you're in a junction to choose between taking the ciggie your friend offered you or turning down the offer, I'd just pray and hope that you would remember back the day you buried your dad's box of cigarette.
Be proud on your effort to save the lives of your loved ones and be proud to save your life too.
To hubby; I honestly believe in your success being departed with cigarettes sooner or later. Just don't ever ever give up.
1231hrs
Dec 11, 2012
Friday, November 23, 2012
My angels
Woke up. Went straight to the hall and sat. Quite a chilly day. It took me a couple of minutes before realizing that one of our two hamsters had already escaped. The tunnel was disengaged and Whitey had managed to slip through it and ESCAPED!
I quickly shut all the room doors making sure the hamster's not gonna go into any of our bedrooms. Searched all over the house while my 3 kids are still weaving their sweet dreams. Whitey is no where to be found. *sigh* I just sat like a statue not knowing what to do. Hoping for it to find it's way home. I just couldn't be bothered to find it.
Headed back into my room and when I opened the door slightly, I could see my little Dhani was looking at me anxiously with teary eyes. Awww my poor baby! "Dhani, are you alright?" I asked in worries.
"Dhani bangun tengok mummy takde. Dhani ingat mummy dah mati. Dhani kejut-kejut Alyssa tanya mummy mana tapi Alyssa tak bangun. Dhani takut mummy mati :("
"Baby, mummy ada lah, I was just outside looking for Whitey. It escaped"
A wide smile and bright shiny eyes were back on his face as usual. "Dhani love mummy!" he added.
Of course. "And God knows how much I love you and the other two angels" I said in my head. In my heart.
O Allah, I was one of the first persons my kids see when they were brought into the world. I am still the first person they see everyday when they wake up. I don't know till when am I going to be able to enjoy their innocent looking face while they're asleep and smell their funny foul smell when they wake up.
But God please let their faces be the last thing I see before I finally meet You, and please make me one of the faces they see before they go back into Your loving arms, Ameen.
Nov 23, 2012
0956hrs
I quickly shut all the room doors making sure the hamster's not gonna go into any of our bedrooms. Searched all over the house while my 3 kids are still weaving their sweet dreams. Whitey is no where to be found. *sigh* I just sat like a statue not knowing what to do. Hoping for it to find it's way home. I just couldn't be bothered to find it.
Headed back into my room and when I opened the door slightly, I could see my little Dhani was looking at me anxiously with teary eyes. Awww my poor baby! "Dhani, are you alright?" I asked in worries.
"Dhani bangun tengok mummy takde. Dhani ingat mummy dah mati. Dhani kejut-kejut Alyssa tanya mummy mana tapi Alyssa tak bangun. Dhani takut mummy mati :("
"Baby, mummy ada lah, I was just outside looking for Whitey. It escaped"
A wide smile and bright shiny eyes were back on his face as usual. "Dhani love mummy!" he added.
Of course. "And God knows how much I love you and the other two angels" I said in my head. In my heart.
O Allah, I was one of the first persons my kids see when they were brought into the world. I am still the first person they see everyday when they wake up. I don't know till when am I going to be able to enjoy their innocent looking face while they're asleep and smell their funny foul smell when they wake up.
But God please let their faces be the last thing I see before I finally meet You, and please make me one of the faces they see before they go back into Your loving arms, Ameen.
Nov 23, 2012
0956hrs
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