A little prick won't hurt! A big mouth does!

There I was in the clinic for my medical check up as instructed by the new company that hires me. Well, I was there on Monday and donated a tiny bottle of my urine for them to check and probably to make sure there's no drugs substance like heroine or weed or whatever. I'm pretty sure I don't do drugs and I don't smoke weed so pheww...but not sure if I'll be in trouble when they found seaweed substance in my urine? Hehe..hope not (mmm...yummy seaweed crisps :) They told me to come back on Tuesday as the cut off time for blood test lab is at 3.30pm and I was there at 4pm. As said by the nurse, they can't keep the blood overnight, it has to be fresh blood so that means I had to go back there again. Huh! Talking about fresh blood! I felt like turning into vampire and kill them to get fresh blood to fulfill my thirst.

Yesterday, again...I walked into the clinic halfheartedly knowing that there'll be a needle poked into my arms in any second. The nurse called my name and asked me for another tiny bottle of urine AGAIN! "The other nurse said I don't have to do this today, just the blood test and X-ray" I told her. "We need it fresh Miss" and so she said. Talking about fresh urine! I felt a little intimidated by the nurse but doing what I had in mind won't help a little bit so I just went.

When I came back from the toilet, I sat on the sofa waiting for my turn for X-ray. A guy sat next to me asked if I was a new hire in Boustead company just like him and of course not. I don't even know what company that was. What more, it sounds like bas**rd which describes exactly the person I chat with (based on my first impression). Here goes his tale of a champ. He had to quit his high paying job in Sarawak 2 months ago due to work stress and demanding workload even though he was provided with a transport, a house and a maid. So to speak, after rejecting an offer from Qatar based company, he is now hired by the Boustead company as an Engineer and will be based in Lumut, Perak with a little less income which he doesn't mind as long as he's near to his sickly mother in Selangor.

I hoped the guy stopped talking right there...and he didn't. He started going on about his next plan to find a wife preferably a teacher just so that she could manage the house, do all the chores and care for the children and him. My ear started to burn and my hand started to feel itchy and felt like slapping somebody but sticking my a** on the sofa and kept listening was all I could do as there were too many people in the clinic and I couldn't move elsewhere. If he's not being a pain in the a** he could have said "I want to find somebody that I could love, care and she doesn't have to work because I'll make sure she'll get everything she needs"
Sure enough that will only happen in dreams and fairy tales. Men in the new era is expecting a lot in women just like the big-mouthed guy I mentioned, he wants to marry a teacher...why teacher? Because she still earns salary that he could sometimes share too! Nonetheless, he left the best part; chores, child minding and house managing to the future wife sob,sob...I hope his future wife will have the greatest strength to deal with this BIG-MOUTHED guy.

Come on...it's not that hard to understand is it? Marriage is not about what 'she' and 'he' should do and shouldn't. Not about what ones expectation of the other. It's about adapting and complementing each other and yes, Love. 'Loving each other till death do us part' is commonly heard in wedding vows but it will never be the same kind of love from beginning till the end. The LOVE in a marriage will evolve and it's up to us to adapt to the changes, to complement and support each other to get through it. One can't expect the other to do something without giving something in return and so the other person can't do something hoping will get something in return. Easily said than understood or done right?

No matter what, life has its turbulence, ups and downs and I'm going through one now...emotional turbulance contemplating on going back to work or not. The world is getting more materialistic so without material like paper, copper or silver ($$$$  that is), you can't survive in a city center with just one breadwinner to feed five mouths!  I'm so thankful I have such a wonderful sleepyhead husband who has flaws and mistakes but remains humble and silly and supportive to make my day easier,brighter and funnier. Plus three kids with amazing personalities (Grumpy, Clowny, Loudy) that makes my life even crazier than ever!!
Times up! I need to pick them up from the daycare as they are currently in so called 'settling in' period so that they can adapt slowly and the transition will not be too shocking for them when I start working next Monday.


xoxo

Mixed up...ape nak rase nih ek?

To start with...Alhamdulillah, praises be to Allah as to my SURPRISE, I did get a call from Amex on Monday morning telling me that I'm hired. Right after I hung up the phone I didn't really know how to react. Should I be happy? Scared? Sad? Excited? Anxious? But one thing for sure, I was dumbfounded! Everything started rushing through my scattered mind. Daycare, long hours, quality time with hubby and children, rest, chores, work commitments. My mind was like going through a slideshow presentation of all the possible things that I'm gonna have to go through once I started with the new job. Well, life is not easy right? First step is always the hardest to take, so be bold and brave to face whatever life may throw at you.

Why is all the mixed feeling?Hmmm... I have not been working permanently for like 5 years now and for the last 1 year I have been doing freelance work such as translating tv subtitles, mystery shopping and helping my sister out with her daycare center. I've got to tell you what I love the most about doing freelance works were the ability to do the works at my own pace and my own comfort  and on my own comfy bed hehe..:) When I do go out for my mystery shopping works occasionally, I'll have my three kids all around me as the contributers in observing how the outlets I'm assigned to perform in terms of service and environment. I know, I know...the works sound so cool but the pay isn't. One thing in doing freelance work is when the job volume is high, you'll feel like you're in heaven but when it isn't, you just hit rock bottom! Especially nowadays more people are working as freelancers which means the potential of getting lots of jobs are getting smaller and smaller by day. Well, i'm not sure about other freelancers but in my case, that's what happened.

Life with 3 growing kids and 2 big bellies is demanding a lot especially almost everything in the world now is getting more expensive. I can't bear it any longer to see my hubby working till dawn and not having his proper sleep and time with children. I made up my mind, I'm gonna go for the job. Even I know the job requires me to work on staggered hours based on shift as it's a worldwide service but I do hope in the end my hubby and I will get equal time to spend with children, equal time to rest and equal money to spend. After all, isn't marriage is about sharing? :-) And to look at it positively, my children will also be able to improve on their social skills and be more independent and confident. I'm not saying they aren't but come on...I'm just trying to provide some comfort to myself...

Furthermore, what I like the best is that I'll be able to start paying my debts and study loan that I've loyally ignored since I unofficially graduated :-) Whoa...I'm full of worries of what's gonna happen but hey, who am I to worry? I can't predict the future but what I can do is to pray, giving my best effort and the rest is up to HIM. IsyaAllah everything will be fine. As for now it's about time for me to do my duties; duty to provide love and care for my children, duty to help my hubby, duty to help my mom, duty to payback my debts and so forth. Wait...I won't call it my duties, I'll call it my responsibilities :-)
All the best to me xoxo

The Unsung Hero of Mine

KAU KATA AKU INI TALI BARUT,
KU HANYA MENCARI TEMPAT BERPAUT,
KAU KATA AKU INI PEMBELOT,
KU KATA KU PENUNTUT KEADILAN,

KAU KATA AKULAH PEMBERONTAK,
KU KATA KU HANYA MENUNTUT HAK,
KAU KATA AKU NAKKAN KUASA,
TIADA YG BERHAK MELAINKAN YANG ESA..

KAU KATA ITU, KAU KATA INI,
SATU MENUNDING PADAKU,
EMPAT LAGI MENUNDING DIRI,

KE MANA PERGINYA SEGALA HAKIKAT,
KE MANA HILANGNYA CERMINAN MIMPI,
MIMPI YANG BERBALAMKAN KEIKHLASAN,
MIMPI YANG BERSULAMKAN YAKIN DAN IMAN,

BERJUANGLAHLAH TIKA NAFAS MASIH DIHELA,
TIKA SURIA MASIH BERGEMBIRA DI UFUK TIMUR,
KU TAKKAN ANGKUR PADA NAFSUMU
YANG TAK MENGENAL PENAT, PUAS DAN JEMU,

KU JUA PUNYA KEINGINAN DAN NAFSU,
BEZANYA DAHAGA NAFSUKU DAN NAFSUMU
AMAT KETARA,
KU HANYA DAHAGAKAN KEBEBASAN DAN SAKSAMA,
DAN KAU BERSELINGKAR DI KITARAN YANG SAMA,
KITARAN HARTA, KUASA DAN DUNIA.

zarita

10072011

The Day!!Jeng,Jeng,Jeng...

Today was meant to be a surprising day for me, but unsurprisingly it wasn't.
First I didn't get the call that I was supposed to get if I'm selected for the position in American Express which means kuang, kuang, kuang...I didn't get the job. What more to say? After all, when 1 of the 3 interviewers told me "Give us 3 reasons why we shouldn't hire you" I can only come up with 1 reason which I  think was logic "Well, you shouldn't hire me...if you have a better candidate" and I was not able to come up with the 2nd and 3rd reasons :D Ask me why they should hire me and I could come up with endless list of it but SHOULDN'T? NO? NEVER? CAN'T? DON'T? these words are not in my life diary...ceh,ceh,ceh...

Actually the entire interview went great. I got through the 1st screening by an Australian staff, then moved on and interviewed by 2 managers there which led to an interview by an American Centre Manager named Terry whom reminded me of John Travolta in Grease movie but with blond hair. That Terry guy did say "Impressive" (with a capital I...mind you) once the final interview ended and everything sounded positive when he started telling me about detailed job description and all the remuneration and benefit I'll be getting.
To my horror, they still need to do some checks with my previous employers and at that moment, I knew I'm Busted! (with a capital B...mind you :)

You see, I'm the kind of person who love doing my job, committed to it and believe in delivering the best to get the best. But my life journey has not been easy ride We probably could talk about it some other time but the things that have been happening in my early stage of mature life has not been too matured.
I made wrong decisions, I did silly actions and took hazardous steps which turned me into a much, much more matured and civilized person nowadays, Thank God for that! So, quitting my good, comfortable job in a reputable companies...yes, with an ies is just one of the miscalculation I had done. No resignation letters, no notice, just left! Sadly and unfortunately the wrong steps I had taken many years ago is still haunting me. So for you fresh graduates out there, better stop thinking about quitting your job without notice or M.I.A as it does affect your future.

Nuff said, ,moving on to another historical event that  has made headlines; BERSIH 2.0 which made my day as a Proud Malaysian and never been prouder than this. No matter who are the fighters, how they fight, where, when and so many other questions that came to our bewildered mind, the most important is, what we fight for. We should be able to see beyond and beneath everything on how crucial is REAL Democracy in our current life, future life and the after life. A fight that worths justice and fairness isn't too bad or too much is it? I've never seen Malaysians so united, strong willed and determined other than today. So go Yellow, go Black, go Brown, go White, go Tanned, go Pale!! No matter what color you are, the colorfulness of our hearts are far greater than anything else. Take care :-)

Boost up your day with nervousness and chaos!

I was freaking out once I got up this morning and kind of lost on what to do first. Walked here and there, in and out of rooms not knowing where to start.

I’ve got myself into trouble by applying for a position in Amex and shortlisted. And today I’m being called for the last interview and I have mixed feeling about it.

Well, it’s not easy to leave your munchkins after years and years of being so comfortable around them day and night but I’m hoping that this is the best for everyone IGW ;)

As for now I’m just gonna try and pump down my heart by turning on the music, next, doing the laundry, wash the dishes, well just about everything that needs to be sorted before I get my big a** marching for the interview ;-)

Great! The music is playing 'Pump Up The Volume" by 'don't know who' when I really need to pump down!

What a booster!!!