Friday, December 28, 2012
Monday, December 24, 2012
Big 1-0
10 is a great number. It's a beginning of a decade. It shows longevity. It shows maturity. It shows connectivity. It shows continuity.
But 10 is also a complicated number. Made up of number 1 and 0, it is the starter for bigger two digit numbers, yet it consists of 0 and 1; smallest numbers there is.
To make up a big number it needs the small ones. To build up a happy, lasting marriage with big numbers; it needs the small unidentified things; the talk, the walk, the pinch, the toss, the call, the pat on the back, the silent, the noise, the laughter, the sadness, the smile and craziness.
The stare, the frown, the challenge, the fight and tears; all of which are important. Small unidentified things that are fairly seen as unimportant but those small things are what makes a marriage unified.
Our marriage is not all bed of roses because we do sleep on the bed of thorns once in a while to keep us on the ground but that's what makes up our number for today. Happy 10th anniversary and hoping to explore more numbers with you if I may say! :)
Alhamdulillah.
1651hrs
December 23, 2012
But 10 is also a complicated number. Made up of number 1 and 0, it is the starter for bigger two digit numbers, yet it consists of 0 and 1; smallest numbers there is.
To make up a big number it needs the small ones. To build up a happy, lasting marriage with big numbers; it needs the small unidentified things; the talk, the walk, the pinch, the toss, the call, the pat on the back, the silent, the noise, the laughter, the sadness, the smile and craziness.
The stare, the frown, the challenge, the fight and tears; all of which are important. Small unidentified things that are fairly seen as unimportant but those small things are what makes a marriage unified.
Our marriage is not all bed of roses because we do sleep on the bed of thorns once in a while to keep us on the ground but that's what makes up our number for today. Happy 10th anniversary and hoping to explore more numbers with you if I may say! :)
Alhamdulillah.
1651hrs
December 23, 2012
Arms for each other
No flowers, no gifts no nothing because what we have is enough; arms for each other to cling. Happy big 1-0 to me and hubby :)
Alhamdulillah.
December 24, 2012
1613hrs
Alhamdulillah.
December 24, 2012
1613hrs
Saturday, December 22, 2012
Constipation
With all these social media I'm being overly fed with excessive information. I'm constipated.
22122012
1110hrs
22122012
1110hrs
Tuesday, December 11, 2012
Smoking doesn't kill. Ignorance does.
Smoking doesn't kill. Ignorance does. Yes, as cliche as it may sound but that's the sad truth.
Most people probably started smoking in their teenage years but sadly there are people who started way earlier innocently thinking that it's all about being the coolest ones. With cigarette in hand puffing the hazardous smoke in and out. Sooner than you think it became your addiction and voila! It's hard to turn back unless you have a strong will to quit and you keep educating yourself about health so you can put ignorance to a big full stop.
Ignorance is not a bliss. Ignorance is a blister that causes more damage, wound and pain to the smokers and people around them. What brought my attention to post something related to smoking is what has been going on in my family. My own beloved family.
................
All my life as a mother, I have been trying to get rid of all the bad habits and the negative attitudes I had prior to being a mother. I battled with my temperament, my selfishness, my recklessness and other endless flaws. Alhamdulillah I think I managed to tone them down and still battling hard.
As much as I try hard to be a good example to my naive children, there were times when I lost in my own battle and fall rock bottom. But most importantly I don't give up and I keep trying to be better and will never stop InsyaAllah. I think the key is to keep trying and never stop. Even when it's the moment where you can no longer stand up, just push yourself harder for good.
The same with smoking and trying to quit. Once you picked up the habit it's hard to stop but it's even harder if you don't have the will and the knowledge on why do you need to stop.
My husband is an avid smoker and been one throughout half of his 30 years of life. He was a great athlete back in high school representing the country in Cricket and eventhough smoking is one negative factor in his sports performance he's still succumbed to the habit and his loyalty to cigarettes remains till now, even with three kids around.
I will keep motivating him to quit hoping that one day he'll realize that smoking doesn't actually give him any goodness but deteriorating health and ashes of burnt money. Besides, being a parent is all about showing a good example and not just talking about it. And that goes to both sides ;)
Despite being around smokers all the time, I will continuously educate my children on the negative sides of smoking to ensure they know and able to think wisely for themselves. My principle in parenting is easy. We teach the children about moral and good values while we can so when they grow up they're equipped to choose what's best for them. Whether or not they're choosing the best option doesn't lie in our hands but we must equip them with what's needed in their life. Once we've put in our best effort in raising them, all we do is just sit back, watch them grow and support them all the way with prayers and love.
One of the things I like to do with the kids is whenever we saw a poster on 'no smoking' campaign, I'll read it loud to them and explain in whatever ways they could understand. I emphasize on the negative effects of smoking on one's life from the aspect of health, financial, sosial, physical and etc.
Thank God they're brilliant kids and they know how to utilized the knowledge they earned. Everytime Daddy or Atuk and Uncles tried to smoke they'll be the alarm detector saying "Jangan!" At times they'll add things like "Ada pencuci toilet dalam rokok!, ada urine dalam rokok! Ada shieldtox dalam tu!"
I just looked at the kids feeling sorry for their effort being ignored and just blown away by the smokes.
As an adult, is this how we're suppose to react to the kids who are trying hard on taking the role to educate parents, grandparents, uncles and aunties. Poor little children. I understand how frustrated you must be but I admire your courage and determination for speaking up and for being consistent in helping out to educate your family about smoking. Thanks kiddos! Mummy salute all three of you; Daniel, Alyssa and Dhani :)
One incident that left great impact to me was when we went back to 'In Laws' house in Rembau. As usual they were playing outside the house while others and I were busy eating the ripe bright yellow and striking red rambutans.
I could see they were busy shovelling the pile of sand just under the rambutan tree. I thought they were just having fun playing with dirts and sands so I told them to play quickly and get inside to clean themselves up. But when my husband came out of room in panic looking for his ciggie, I knew the kids were up to something and in my opinion they were doing the right thing.
Husband asked "Did you see my cigarette box anywhere?" "Nope!" I answered firmly. He then asked "Dhani, Alyssa did you happen to play with my cigarette box?"
They replied "We have no idea" "Is it not in your hand?" Dhani added while their facial expression were showing some kind of hidden agenda. I knew it. They buried Daddy's cigarette box inside the pile of sand. Oh well, I'd rather they do that than burying their father's dead body who lost a battle with cigarette. Same goes to my eldest son, every time he found Daddy's ciggie box, he'll come up to me and asked "Mummy, is it ok?" for approval to throw away the cigarettes. As usual I would always nod to assure he's taking the right action. Smoking is just as wasteful as throwing it away right? So if you don't wanna waste, don't buy it at all.
I could see how much effort they've been putting to stop Daddy from smoking and from the determination they portray, I could sense they're no where near to giving up. Sometimes Dhani gets confused on the mixed messages between Daddy and Mummy; he pretends to smoke using a pencil and I feel bad seeing that. I feel helpless. My kids are helpless. Only smokers can help themselves to quit smoking and help others to feel less helpless in helping them to quit.
To smokers; 'please help yourself and let others help you in trying to quit'. Stop being ignorant and start educating yourselves. This issue isn't about how cute and clever the kids get when they try to stop you from smoking. It is about us being a clever responsible adult feeding the kids with moral and good values but practicing the contradictory. Now THAT is the real issue!
My post today is mainly to remind myself; a parent with great responsibilities on my shoulders and even the emphasize is more on smoking issue, it can be applied in many aspects of our life as an adult.
To my kids; You guys are my greatest heros. If one day you're in a junction to choose between taking the ciggie your friend offered you or turning down the offer, I'd just pray and hope that you would remember back the day you buried your dad's box of cigarette.
Be proud on your effort to save the lives of your loved ones and be proud to save your life too.
To hubby; I honestly believe in your success being departed with cigarettes sooner or later. Just don't ever ever give up.
1231hrs
Dec 11, 2012
Most people probably started smoking in their teenage years but sadly there are people who started way earlier innocently thinking that it's all about being the coolest ones. With cigarette in hand puffing the hazardous smoke in and out. Sooner than you think it became your addiction and voila! It's hard to turn back unless you have a strong will to quit and you keep educating yourself about health so you can put ignorance to a big full stop.
Ignorance is not a bliss. Ignorance is a blister that causes more damage, wound and pain to the smokers and people around them. What brought my attention to post something related to smoking is what has been going on in my family. My own beloved family.
................
All my life as a mother, I have been trying to get rid of all the bad habits and the negative attitudes I had prior to being a mother. I battled with my temperament, my selfishness, my recklessness and other endless flaws. Alhamdulillah I think I managed to tone them down and still battling hard.
As much as I try hard to be a good example to my naive children, there were times when I lost in my own battle and fall rock bottom. But most importantly I don't give up and I keep trying to be better and will never stop InsyaAllah. I think the key is to keep trying and never stop. Even when it's the moment where you can no longer stand up, just push yourself harder for good.
The same with smoking and trying to quit. Once you picked up the habit it's hard to stop but it's even harder if you don't have the will and the knowledge on why do you need to stop.
My husband is an avid smoker and been one throughout half of his 30 years of life. He was a great athlete back in high school representing the country in Cricket and eventhough smoking is one negative factor in his sports performance he's still succumbed to the habit and his loyalty to cigarettes remains till now, even with three kids around.
I will keep motivating him to quit hoping that one day he'll realize that smoking doesn't actually give him any goodness but deteriorating health and ashes of burnt money. Besides, being a parent is all about showing a good example and not just talking about it. And that goes to both sides ;)
Despite being around smokers all the time, I will continuously educate my children on the negative sides of smoking to ensure they know and able to think wisely for themselves. My principle in parenting is easy. We teach the children about moral and good values while we can so when they grow up they're equipped to choose what's best for them. Whether or not they're choosing the best option doesn't lie in our hands but we must equip them with what's needed in their life. Once we've put in our best effort in raising them, all we do is just sit back, watch them grow and support them all the way with prayers and love.
One of the things I like to do with the kids is whenever we saw a poster on 'no smoking' campaign, I'll read it loud to them and explain in whatever ways they could understand. I emphasize on the negative effects of smoking on one's life from the aspect of health, financial, sosial, physical and etc.
Thank God they're brilliant kids and they know how to utilized the knowledge they earned. Everytime Daddy or Atuk and Uncles tried to smoke they'll be the alarm detector saying "Jangan!" At times they'll add things like "Ada pencuci toilet dalam rokok!, ada urine dalam rokok! Ada shieldtox dalam tu!"
I just looked at the kids feeling sorry for their effort being ignored and just blown away by the smokes.
As an adult, is this how we're suppose to react to the kids who are trying hard on taking the role to educate parents, grandparents, uncles and aunties. Poor little children. I understand how frustrated you must be but I admire your courage and determination for speaking up and for being consistent in helping out to educate your family about smoking. Thanks kiddos! Mummy salute all three of you; Daniel, Alyssa and Dhani :)
One incident that left great impact to me was when we went back to 'In Laws' house in Rembau. As usual they were playing outside the house while others and I were busy eating the ripe bright yellow and striking red rambutans.
I could see they were busy shovelling the pile of sand just under the rambutan tree. I thought they were just having fun playing with dirts and sands so I told them to play quickly and get inside to clean themselves up. But when my husband came out of room in panic looking for his ciggie, I knew the kids were up to something and in my opinion they were doing the right thing.
Husband asked "Did you see my cigarette box anywhere?" "Nope!" I answered firmly. He then asked "Dhani, Alyssa did you happen to play with my cigarette box?"
They replied "We have no idea" "Is it not in your hand?" Dhani added while their facial expression were showing some kind of hidden agenda. I knew it. They buried Daddy's cigarette box inside the pile of sand. Oh well, I'd rather they do that than burying their father's dead body who lost a battle with cigarette. Same goes to my eldest son, every time he found Daddy's ciggie box, he'll come up to me and asked "Mummy, is it ok?" for approval to throw away the cigarettes. As usual I would always nod to assure he's taking the right action. Smoking is just as wasteful as throwing it away right? So if you don't wanna waste, don't buy it at all.
I could see how much effort they've been putting to stop Daddy from smoking and from the determination they portray, I could sense they're no where near to giving up. Sometimes Dhani gets confused on the mixed messages between Daddy and Mummy; he pretends to smoke using a pencil and I feel bad seeing that. I feel helpless. My kids are helpless. Only smokers can help themselves to quit smoking and help others to feel less helpless in helping them to quit.
To smokers; 'please help yourself and let others help you in trying to quit'. Stop being ignorant and start educating yourselves. This issue isn't about how cute and clever the kids get when they try to stop you from smoking. It is about us being a clever responsible adult feeding the kids with moral and good values but practicing the contradictory. Now THAT is the real issue!
My post today is mainly to remind myself; a parent with great responsibilities on my shoulders and even the emphasize is more on smoking issue, it can be applied in many aspects of our life as an adult.
To my kids; You guys are my greatest heros. If one day you're in a junction to choose between taking the ciggie your friend offered you or turning down the offer, I'd just pray and hope that you would remember back the day you buried your dad's box of cigarette.
Be proud on your effort to save the lives of your loved ones and be proud to save your life too.
To hubby; I honestly believe in your success being departed with cigarettes sooner or later. Just don't ever ever give up.
1231hrs
Dec 11, 2012
Friday, November 23, 2012
My angels
Woke up. Went straight to the hall and sat. Quite a chilly day. It took me a couple of minutes before realizing that one of our two hamsters had already escaped. The tunnel was disengaged and Whitey had managed to slip through it and ESCAPED!
I quickly shut all the room doors making sure the hamster's not gonna go into any of our bedrooms. Searched all over the house while my 3 kids are still weaving their sweet dreams. Whitey is no where to be found. *sigh* I just sat like a statue not knowing what to do. Hoping for it to find it's way home. I just couldn't be bothered to find it.
Headed back into my room and when I opened the door slightly, I could see my little Dhani was looking at me anxiously with teary eyes. Awww my poor baby! "Dhani, are you alright?" I asked in worries.
"Dhani bangun tengok mummy takde. Dhani ingat mummy dah mati. Dhani kejut-kejut Alyssa tanya mummy mana tapi Alyssa tak bangun. Dhani takut mummy mati :("
"Baby, mummy ada lah, I was just outside looking for Whitey. It escaped"
A wide smile and bright shiny eyes were back on his face as usual. "Dhani love mummy!" he added.
Of course. "And God knows how much I love you and the other two angels" I said in my head. In my heart.
O Allah, I was one of the first persons my kids see when they were brought into the world. I am still the first person they see everyday when they wake up. I don't know till when am I going to be able to enjoy their innocent looking face while they're asleep and smell their funny foul smell when they wake up.
But God please let their faces be the last thing I see before I finally meet You, and please make me one of the faces they see before they go back into Your loving arms, Ameen.
Nov 23, 2012
0956hrs
I quickly shut all the room doors making sure the hamster's not gonna go into any of our bedrooms. Searched all over the house while my 3 kids are still weaving their sweet dreams. Whitey is no where to be found. *sigh* I just sat like a statue not knowing what to do. Hoping for it to find it's way home. I just couldn't be bothered to find it.
Headed back into my room and when I opened the door slightly, I could see my little Dhani was looking at me anxiously with teary eyes. Awww my poor baby! "Dhani, are you alright?" I asked in worries.
"Dhani bangun tengok mummy takde. Dhani ingat mummy dah mati. Dhani kejut-kejut Alyssa tanya mummy mana tapi Alyssa tak bangun. Dhani takut mummy mati :("
"Baby, mummy ada lah, I was just outside looking for Whitey. It escaped"
A wide smile and bright shiny eyes were back on his face as usual. "Dhani love mummy!" he added.
Of course. "And God knows how much I love you and the other two angels" I said in my head. In my heart.
O Allah, I was one of the first persons my kids see when they were brought into the world. I am still the first person they see everyday when they wake up. I don't know till when am I going to be able to enjoy their innocent looking face while they're asleep and smell their funny foul smell when they wake up.
But God please let their faces be the last thing I see before I finally meet You, and please make me one of the faces they see before they go back into Your loving arms, Ameen.
Nov 23, 2012
0956hrs
Sunday, October 28, 2012
Sacrifice
Selamat Hari raya Korban!
S.A.C.R.I.F.I.C.E is a big word.
Even if it's a little too late.
0912hrs
28/10/2012
S.A.C.R.I.F.I.C.E is a big word.
Even if it's a little too late.
0912hrs
28/10/2012
Wednesday, October 24, 2012
People ask
People ask you to tell the truth and yet when you tell the truth they call it condemn.
People ask for your feedback and yet when you do it honestly they call it complaint.
People ask to be your friend but when you're in pursuit of success they congratulate you with jealousy.
People ask to be your friend but when you're happy they're mad with your happiness.
People ask you for comfort but when you need one? They're too busy being comfortable with their lives.
People ask for shelter from you but is your shelter big enough for everyone?
People ask how was your day. Yet when you tell them of all the fun you had, they say you're bragging.
People never ask to be your enemy and yet you have many. Sad story.
People ask. We answer. That's how it is.
0243hrs
24/10/2012
People ask for your feedback and yet when you do it honestly they call it complaint.
People ask to be your friend but when you're in pursuit of success they congratulate you with jealousy.
People ask to be your friend but when you're happy they're mad with your happiness.
People ask you for comfort but when you need one? They're too busy being comfortable with their lives.
People ask for shelter from you but is your shelter big enough for everyone?
People ask how was your day. Yet when you tell them of all the fun you had, they say you're bragging.
People never ask to be your enemy and yet you have many. Sad story.
People ask. We answer. That's how it is.
0243hrs
24/10/2012
Tuesday, October 23, 2012
Reap what you sow
That vision.
Appears and disappears.
Reappears.
It fills me with fears.
Fear of the unknown.
But who am I to groan.
I just reap what I had sown.
1220hrs
23/10/2012
Appears and disappears.
Reappears.
It fills me with fears.
Fear of the unknown.
But who am I to groan.
I just reap what I had sown.
1220hrs
23/10/2012
Saturday, October 20, 2012
So many to do yet so relaxed!
Lazying around in Fendi's house. What a good way to spend the weekend. Weekend that's supposed to be busy. Supposedly filled with packing and unpacking chaotic.
Apparently I don't seem to be busy. Nash doesn't seem to be busy too! He's been sleeping on the couch since afternoon and it's now almost 9pm.
With the plan to move back to Seremban in just about a week we are seriously screwing ourselves up. Nothing is packed eventhough I have been talking about it non stop for the past two weeks.
The business planning and preparation is another thing. Gosh! It's damn overwhelming and I'm surprise that we are this relaxed and unprepared.
The intention of coming to Fendi's house is so that the kids are occupied; watching cds, tv and busy with games but to be honest I am occupied too! I have been downloading games, apps and surfing the net since like forever. Mentang2lah Fendi pakai Unifi lajunyaaaa!!! Syoklah dok menguplod and menginstall games and apps!
Dahla tengah kopak. Duit bebetul tinggal limaploh hengget and budak2 is not well at the moment. Alhamdulillah Daniel has just got better from asthma but Alyssa has caught the virus; flu, cough, fever and somehow she sounds like she's having mild asthma attack at the moment :(
We still have medications from the previous trip to clinic so we just use that to help making her feel more comfortable. InsyaAllah she'll get better soon.
Life is tough but you know what is tougher? Motivating ourself to achieve what we aim for in having a better life. Serius tough wey! I am in that shit right now and praying and hoping that I'll have the will to push myself harder for better. Am working on it and will always will.
Nash! Bangunla wey... anak2 dah kebuloq tak makan dari tengahari ni!
Kalau agak2 nak tido dari pagi ke malam baik dok umah je boleh gak aku packing barang nak pindah kan?
(dialog yang aku ulang2 dari dua minggu lepas ;p)
Klah. Chow!
2057hrs
Apparently I don't seem to be busy. Nash doesn't seem to be busy too! He's been sleeping on the couch since afternoon and it's now almost 9pm.
With the plan to move back to Seremban in just about a week we are seriously screwing ourselves up. Nothing is packed eventhough I have been talking about it non stop for the past two weeks.
The business planning and preparation is another thing. Gosh! It's damn overwhelming and I'm surprise that we are this relaxed and unprepared.
The intention of coming to Fendi's house is so that the kids are occupied; watching cds, tv and busy with games but to be honest I am occupied too! I have been downloading games, apps and surfing the net since like forever. Mentang2lah Fendi pakai Unifi lajunyaaaa!!! Syoklah dok menguplod and menginstall games and apps!
Dahla tengah kopak. Duit bebetul tinggal limaploh hengget and budak2 is not well at the moment. Alhamdulillah Daniel has just got better from asthma but Alyssa has caught the virus; flu, cough, fever and somehow she sounds like she's having mild asthma attack at the moment :(
We still have medications from the previous trip to clinic so we just use that to help making her feel more comfortable. InsyaAllah she'll get better soon.
Life is tough but you know what is tougher? Motivating ourself to achieve what we aim for in having a better life. Serius tough wey! I am in that shit right now and praying and hoping that I'll have the will to push myself harder for better. Am working on it and will always will.
Nash! Bangunla wey... anak2 dah kebuloq tak makan dari tengahari ni!
Kalau agak2 nak tido dari pagi ke malam baik dok umah je boleh gak aku packing barang nak pindah kan?
(dialog yang aku ulang2 dari dua minggu lepas ;p)
Klah. Chow!
2057hrs
Thursday, October 18, 2012
Wednesday, October 17, 2012
Overwhelmed
The title says exactly how I feel right now.
Too much of everything is tiring and overwhelming but for better life, why not? I would give it a try.
My hardest try.
Moving house.
Repainting current house.
Packing and unpacking things.
Everything that needs to be settled before we move.
What more, all of the above needs big MONEY.
Oh yeah. We're starting our business soon InsyaAllah. Auto garage business.
Now, THAT is going to make it even more overwhelming for us all.
I just pray, hope and try to make things as easy and smooth for everyone. May Allah bless this next BIG step we're taking. InsyaAllah and ameen to that.
Too much of everything is tiring and overwhelming but for better life, why not? I would give it a try.
My hardest try.
Moving house.
Repainting current house.
Packing and unpacking things.
Everything that needs to be settled before we move.
What more, all of the above needs big MONEY.
Oh yeah. We're starting our business soon InsyaAllah. Auto garage business.
Now, THAT is going to make it even more overwhelming for us all.
I just pray, hope and try to make things as easy and smooth for everyone. May Allah bless this next BIG step we're taking. InsyaAllah and ameen to that.
Saturday, September 29, 2012
"God will save me?"
A man was drowning when a boat came by. Man on the boat said "Let me help you."
The drowning man declined "No thanks, God will save me."
A second boat passed by and the drowning man declined the help offered to him, again saying "No thanks, God will save me."
The man died and when he finally meets the Creator he asks "God why didn't you save me?"
"I did, I sent the 2 boats you silly!"
P/s: It might be a joke made up for fun but the truth is ~ Allah's help doesn't always come straight to us, it could be in many ways or forms; through medium or non.
Don't ever be too arrogant to accept.
The drowning man declined "No thanks, God will save me."
A second boat passed by and the drowning man declined the help offered to him, again saying "No thanks, God will save me."
The man died and when he finally meets the Creator he asks "God why didn't you save me?"
"I did, I sent the 2 boats you silly!"
P/s: It might be a joke made up for fun but the truth is ~ Allah's help doesn't always come straight to us, it could be in many ways or forms; through medium or non.
Don't ever be too arrogant to accept.
Tuesday, September 25, 2012
'Goodbye' is always hard
Never once I thought about how hard saying goodbye is. Being a naive child, I have always thought it was actually a happy ritual you do just before departing from one place to another. Now that I've been through gazzilions of goodbyes, I finally realized that there has never been a 'good' in goodbyes. There is only 'hopes and dreams' in goodbyes.
To those I have said goodbye to, I'm praying and hoping that everything will be better for all of us after that one deceiving 'goodbye' we said to each other.
Keep hoping and dreaming for better :) Shall we use 'see you later' more than 'goodbye'? It does make us look forward to the future doesn't it? ;)
~ See you later ~
To those I have said goodbye to, I'm praying and hoping that everything will be better for all of us after that one deceiving 'goodbye' we said to each other.
Keep hoping and dreaming for better :) Shall we use 'see you later' more than 'goodbye'? It does make us look forward to the future doesn't it? ;)
~ See you later ~
Tuesday, September 11, 2012
Yay or nay?
Well to cut long stories short, I'm back to work and it's graveyard hours. We follow US working hours and you can officially call me batwoman! LOL
Don't know if it's a good thing or bad but Alhamdulillah it's been going good so far and i kind of like it.
On the other hand, i'm missing the comfort and the warmth of being home at this time snuggling under the duvet snuggling with my hubs and kids. Sigh.
Whatever it may be, may it turn to be the best for all of us and a blessed life by Allah, Ameen.
Don't know if it's a good thing or bad but Alhamdulillah it's been going good so far and i kind of like it.
On the other hand, i'm missing the comfort and the warmth of being home at this time snuggling under the duvet snuggling with my hubs and kids. Sigh.
Whatever it may be, may it turn to be the best for all of us and a blessed life by Allah, Ameen.
Sunday, May 13, 2012
The Warrior Mum
It's mothers day and a question that keeps going back and forth in my mind is this; "What would my life be without my mum?"
I have no real answer to that for sure but sorrow is the big word that flashes in my head
:( My mum is the pillar of my strength and it was only in the last few years I started to feel the real mother-daughter connection with her because long before that, it was only cold bond that's filled with anger, fights, arguments and adult tanthrums.
We didn't get along well being around each other. I didn't grow up with her and the fact that being left at the tender age of five, left me with so many questions and I ended up having a deep grudge and always putting a strong unshakeable barrier between us.
That was when I went through a challenging and thought provoking chapter of my life. Mum left me for her own reason which I now understand and no longer question about but that chapter where I had to deal with my insecurity and vulnarability for being left was so horrible. I suppose, just like any other child who came from a broken family, the feel of insecurity and the need of attention and love was always my main agenda thus it got me into so many troubles and dilemma.
Alhamdulillah, fair enough, all the adventures, troubles and struggles I went through only to make me a better person and I can say the same positive impact is felt by my mum. She was married so young and didn't even have enough time to grow and mature herself, what more raising and managing eight kids altogether. I know how overwhelming that duties can get but she maneuvered her boat through storms and lightning until she couldn't anymore and stranded. That's when she had to make a final call and mistake happened. We as human, do make mistakes on our choices sometimes but what's important is how we deal with it from there. All that aside, now we're back together as a family, reunited family..Alhamdulillah still with arguments, fights and adult tanthrums to keep us constantly understanding each other, but without hate :)
I have to give a big credit and endless appreciation to my mum Fatimah Bt Mahamed for her persistence, determination and courage to still fight and win the battle. The battle to win her daughter's heart again.
I thank ALLAH for letting me exist in this world with the help of my mum, a warrior mum who fought endless war, who sailed endless voyage, who survived endless battle. All that with the help of Allah and pure love in heart with no boudaries that melted my ego and anger as a daughter who once was her mum hater. What we've been through has made us who we are now and I'm thankful and happy for it.
Without Allah's blessings, non of these would ever happen. Without it, I wouldn't be this strong. As strong as my warrior mum.... so mak, I'm asking your forgiveness on whatever mistakes I've done which hurt you and I know my apologize won't be enough to diminish all my wrong doings but...I know what a mum's heart is like, it is without grudge, full of love and very forgiving :) Mak, please pray for me so that I can also be a warrior mum with endless fighting spirit like you. May Allah grant you happiness and His blessings in life and hereafter...Amin Ya Rabbal AlAmin.. SAYANG MAK <3<3
:( My mum is the pillar of my strength and it was only in the last few years I started to feel the real mother-daughter connection with her because long before that, it was only cold bond that's filled with anger, fights, arguments and adult tanthrums.
Alhamdulillah, fair enough, all the adventures, troubles and struggles I went through only to make me a better person and I can say the same positive impact is felt by my mum. She was married so young and didn't even have enough time to grow and mature herself, what more raising and managing eight kids altogether. I know how overwhelming that duties can get but she maneuvered her boat through storms and lightning until she couldn't anymore and stranded. That's when she had to make a final call and mistake happened. We as human, do make mistakes on our choices sometimes but what's important is how we deal with it from there. All that aside, now we're back together as a family, reunited family..Alhamdulillah still with arguments, fights and adult tanthrums to keep us constantly understanding each other, but without hate :)
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| Always being there to walk me through even in her own difficult to understand ways :) |
I have to give a big credit and endless appreciation to my mum Fatimah Bt Mahamed for her persistence, determination and courage to still fight and win the battle. The battle to win her daughter's heart again.
I thank ALLAH for letting me exist in this world with the help of my mum, a warrior mum who fought endless war, who sailed endless voyage, who survived endless battle. All that with the help of Allah and pure love in heart with no boudaries that melted my ego and anger as a daughter who once was her mum hater. What we've been through has made us who we are now and I'm thankful and happy for it.Without Allah's blessings, non of these would ever happen. Without it, I wouldn't be this strong. As strong as my warrior mum.... so mak, I'm asking your forgiveness on whatever mistakes I've done which hurt you and I know my apologize won't be enough to diminish all my wrong doings but...I know what a mum's heart is like, it is without grudge, full of love and very forgiving :) Mak, please pray for me so that I can also be a warrior mum with endless fighting spirit like you. May Allah grant you happiness and His blessings in life and hereafter...Amin Ya Rabbal AlAmin.. SAYANG MAK <3<3
The heart of a mother is a deep abyss, at the bottom of which you will always find forgiveness and true love..
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| Those were the days.. |
Monday, April 23, 2012
From caterpillar into chrysalis into butterfly
As I have given it full thought, I think it's about time for me to do it. The reason is mainly because I can't be in denial anymore. I know what I know and I feel what I feel. Plus, how much longer can I continue ignoring the blessings and the gifts He has given me. Sacrifice is a big word but it can be started from a tiny little step. 'One step at a time' so they say but has anyone ever said whether it's small or big step? Does it even make a difference? Well as long as we know we are making some kind of progress and improvement in being closer to our Creator, it does not matter.
There can be many ways of how we could take this daunting and overwhelming little step but in the end it's up to oneself of how they are going to do it. Nobody else could tell you what to do, nothing could influence you to do it or not to do it, if you have already decided and determined to do it. All you need is just some strength from Him to overcome any challenges, some encouragement, continuous self motivation to keep you going and once in a while a little knock on your head as a reality check on what is the real purpose of living in this overly populated world of self centered people which unfortunately includes me.
Yes, I have to do this...I know. After all, why would something that's good for myself can be intimidating when I didn't even think twice about throwing rambutans peel from the top of a shopping mall to people down on the ground level , I didn't even give it a thought about skipping my lecture class during college time just to have fun with a bunch of friends or my then boyfriend now husband? Even to argue and fight with my beloved mum? Not even when I was puffing that smoke of weed and drinking that very unfavorable drink. I did not even blink my eyes before doing something that would actually turn my world totally 360 degrees upside down?. So why would this tiny self improvement step is so daunting to me? Well, I supposed it's mainly because something that's out of my control and that is people perception and you know what? I don't give a damn about it (still trying to believe and commit to what I said)...I shouldn't think negatively about people and never assume of their thought because I never know for sure..
It's time for me to make this step in order to be closer to Him. I'm not saying there's a condition for us to be closer to God otherwise we'll never get there, No!! God is very Loving and Forgiving, He is very Understanding and Approachable. Doesn't matter what is your skin colour, no matter what your political ideology is, how modernized or aged your thinking is, how many bad things or good deeds you've done, how high or low status you are, He'll always accept you without labeling. Only we people label each other.
If you're Skinny = Anorexic, if you're Fat or obese = Hippo, if your'e being Nice and Friendly = Fake, if you're Quiet = Snobbish, if you're Sharing things and info = Show Off, if you Don't share = Stingy and Self Centered, if you're too Active = ADHD, if you're Passive = Slow Learner, if your child gets confused once in a while between alphabets and numbers = Dyslexic and need I tell you more list? Nope, I guess you understand what I'm trying to deliver here. People = Good at Labeling whereas Allah the Almighty = Never Labels. Come to Him as you are and He'll guide you in the next step towards a better life.
For me personally, if I can put so much effort in trying to please people around me, why can't I try to please My Creator? How do we know what he likes? Well it goes back to what you feel is right and what's not. Have you ever felt right when you did something wrong? And have you ever felt wrong when you did something right? If both your answers are yes then you might wanna go and have your brain checked thehehe :) I have to say that, for each individual, our definition of good and bad are different from one another based on our nature, upbringing, surroundings and our experiences in the past, present and maybe future. But in the end it goes back to guidance by Him through our instinct plus the Quran, Sunnah and Hadiths.
I am still in learning and discovering pace when it comes to belief and religion and will always be because it's a continuous process. I am so not the so called religious people nor a perfect person who's never done anything wrong (does this kind of person exist anyway?), I am also not representing anything from Islamic point of view. What I put into words here is just a humble streaming of inner feeling from a tiny heart of mine in this borderless beautiful yet challenging world created by Him, Allah The Almighty.
As for now, let me- the itching and irritating when touched caterpillar, be secluded internally, emotionally to be together with Him as a chrysalis inside a cocoon and when I finally come out of my hiding, InsyaAllah, hopefully I'll spread my beautiful colourful wings to fly as a sign of freedom and liberation.
To those who didn't understand and still wondering what is the daunting little step I was talking about, please don't get it wrong... Islam never teach its believers to commit suicide nor suicide bombing. It's not about sacrificing hundreds or perhaps thousands of innocent people in the so called terrorism to become martyr. This is just about me starting my journey again to cover up as a hijabi. So, wearing a hijab is not just about covering up or being oppressed, it really is about a journey of self discovering of a woman who was once a girl :)
Till then, Peace No War ;)
There can be many ways of how we could take this daunting and overwhelming little step but in the end it's up to oneself of how they are going to do it. Nobody else could tell you what to do, nothing could influence you to do it or not to do it, if you have already decided and determined to do it. All you need is just some strength from Him to overcome any challenges, some encouragement, continuous self motivation to keep you going and once in a while a little knock on your head as a reality check on what is the real purpose of living in this overly populated world of self centered people which unfortunately includes me.
Yes, I have to do this...I know. After all, why would something that's good for myself can be intimidating when I didn't even think twice about throwing rambutans peel from the top of a shopping mall to people down on the ground level , I didn't even give it a thought about skipping my lecture class during college time just to have fun with a bunch of friends or my then boyfriend now husband? Even to argue and fight with my beloved mum? Not even when I was puffing that smoke of weed and drinking that very unfavorable drink. I did not even blink my eyes before doing something that would actually turn my world totally 360 degrees upside down?. So why would this tiny self improvement step is so daunting to me? Well, I supposed it's mainly because something that's out of my control and that is people perception and you know what? I don't give a damn about it (still trying to believe and commit to what I said)...I shouldn't think negatively about people and never assume of their thought because I never know for sure..
It's time for me to make this step in order to be closer to Him. I'm not saying there's a condition for us to be closer to God otherwise we'll never get there, No!! God is very Loving and Forgiving, He is very Understanding and Approachable. Doesn't matter what is your skin colour, no matter what your political ideology is, how modernized or aged your thinking is, how many bad things or good deeds you've done, how high or low status you are, He'll always accept you without labeling. Only we people label each other.
If you're Skinny = Anorexic, if you're Fat or obese = Hippo, if your'e being Nice and Friendly = Fake, if you're Quiet = Snobbish, if you're Sharing things and info = Show Off, if you Don't share = Stingy and Self Centered, if you're too Active = ADHD, if you're Passive = Slow Learner, if your child gets confused once in a while between alphabets and numbers = Dyslexic and need I tell you more list? Nope, I guess you understand what I'm trying to deliver here. People = Good at Labeling whereas Allah the Almighty = Never Labels. Come to Him as you are and He'll guide you in the next step towards a better life.
For me personally, if I can put so much effort in trying to please people around me, why can't I try to please My Creator? How do we know what he likes? Well it goes back to what you feel is right and what's not. Have you ever felt right when you did something wrong? And have you ever felt wrong when you did something right? If both your answers are yes then you might wanna go and have your brain checked thehehe :) I have to say that, for each individual, our definition of good and bad are different from one another based on our nature, upbringing, surroundings and our experiences in the past, present and maybe future. But in the end it goes back to guidance by Him through our instinct plus the Quran, Sunnah and Hadiths.
I am still in learning and discovering pace when it comes to belief and religion and will always be because it's a continuous process. I am so not the so called religious people nor a perfect person who's never done anything wrong (does this kind of person exist anyway?), I am also not representing anything from Islamic point of view. What I put into words here is just a humble streaming of inner feeling from a tiny heart of mine in this borderless beautiful yet challenging world created by Him, Allah The Almighty.
As for now, let me- the itching and irritating when touched caterpillar, be secluded internally, emotionally to be together with Him as a chrysalis inside a cocoon and when I finally come out of my hiding, InsyaAllah, hopefully I'll spread my beautiful colourful wings to fly as a sign of freedom and liberation.
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| From an irritating itching caterpillar |
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| Into meditating Crysalis |
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| And finally a carefree butterly |
To those who didn't understand and still wondering what is the daunting little step I was talking about, please don't get it wrong... Islam never teach its believers to commit suicide nor suicide bombing. It's not about sacrificing hundreds or perhaps thousands of innocent people in the so called terrorism to become martyr. This is just about me starting my journey again to cover up as a hijabi. So, wearing a hijab is not just about covering up or being oppressed, it really is about a journey of self discovering of a woman who was once a girl :)
Till then, Peace No War ;)
Wednesday, April 11, 2012
Into Pumpernickel Head's Thoughts
I've been thinking about changing the name of my blog for quite a while and finally, Yippee :-) I managed to change my blog's name from, the old mynolongersecret that sounds like an online lingerie store into what I think is way cooler. After doing some thinking and research, I gave a nod to myself to the name of pumpernickel head.
For those who may not know, pumpernickel is actually a type of rye bread which is heavy, slightly sweet and Germany traditional bread that's made of whole grain coarsely grounded rye. Well, what more can I ask for other than the perfect description for myself ;-) I'm heavy in the head- always full of thinking and thoughts, I'm heavy on the outside too :-), I'm sweet as can be most of the times though at certain times I like a little touch of sour and spice to myself. I call myself modern and updated person but you can never take away the traditional or the 'kekampungan' part of me.
For instance, I love wearing kain batik compared to sexy lingerie or night gowns, I also looove eating ulam-ulaman kampung like ulam raja, petai, kerdas, pucuk jering, jering, pegaga and what not. Not to mention, budu, sambal belacan, cencaluk, tempoyak. Just to name a few traditional food that I can't live without. And don't get me started about the old Allahyarham Tan Sri P. Ramlee's black and white movies that I enjoy watching back then, now and forever.
Yes I'm heavy, sweet and traditional. So peeps, from now on Pumpernickelhead it is :-D
For those who may not know, pumpernickel is actually a type of rye bread which is heavy, slightly sweet and Germany traditional bread that's made of whole grain coarsely grounded rye. Well, what more can I ask for other than the perfect description for myself ;-) I'm heavy in the head- always full of thinking and thoughts, I'm heavy on the outside too :-), I'm sweet as can be most of the times though at certain times I like a little touch of sour and spice to myself. I call myself modern and updated person but you can never take away the traditional or the 'kekampungan' part of me.
For instance, I love wearing kain batik compared to sexy lingerie or night gowns, I also looove eating ulam-ulaman kampung like ulam raja, petai, kerdas, pucuk jering, jering, pegaga and what not. Not to mention, budu, sambal belacan, cencaluk, tempoyak. Just to name a few traditional food that I can't live without. And don't get me started about the old Allahyarham Tan Sri P. Ramlee's black and white movies that I enjoy watching back then, now and forever.
Yes I'm heavy, sweet and traditional. So peeps, from now on Pumpernickelhead it is :-D
Thursday, March 22, 2012
Putrajaya 4th International Hot Air Balloon Fiesta..Yang nak tak dapat, yang tak nak dapat :)
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| Greeted by this giant sim card hot air balloon and 2 blimps |
As the title of this post says, I am going to share about the event held last weekend at Putrajaya which to me is a modern and sleek cosmopolitan city but the whole impression is brought to shame the moment you step into the public toilet...
Being told by the event staff on a telephone conversation that the ticket counter would be opened half an hour before the hot air balloon ride session starts, we got there as early as 7am. There were 2 sessions of balloon rides 8am-11am and 6pm-9pm. So in our thought, arriving an hour earlier than the actual session would be sufficient for us to get the tickets though limited tickets were being sold.
Got there, parked the car and asked my son and nephew to race to the queue just to make sure that we'd have our slim chance of riding the hot air balloon amongst hundreds (perhaps thousands) of hopeful people but unfortunately only 300 of us will actually be floating in the air while grinning foolishly to the people down under :)
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| Ini sume kes malu bertanya sesat jalan la ni! beraturla...smpi ke sudah x dpt tiket der!! |
So, we queued up behind what seemed like 200 people, anxiously waiting to know whether we would be lucky enough to have a ride on our eldest son's 9th birthday. Couldn't wait any longer, I bothered my sleepy looking husband to check at the counter if there's still tickets available but seeing the crowd queuing up I was pretty sure there must be. He came back with heart wrenching news that the 300 numbers were already given out and that's it.So that was it! My dream of sailing in the cloud on hot air balloon with my family especially on my son's birthday while me hysterically shouting " I'm on top of the world!!!" was done. There and then.FULLSTOP.
What the crowd might not know was the fact that only people with numbers could buy the tickets which were already finished by 8am. The highly motivated person who was given out the first number to buy the ticket was already standing there at 1am! 1 freaking am!! You can't be more desperate than I was! Last number given to a lucky lad at around 5.30am. So, don't even bother asking about me and family who woke up at 6am okay? :)
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| The clowns..try harder next time :) |
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| Yeay,yeay dapat belon!! walaupun x dpt naik hot air balloon! |
Though we might not have the time of our life on the hot air balloon, at least we get 2 free balloon swords from the 3 supposedly happy clowns but seemed sadder than people whose dream of riding the hot air balloon crushed to the ground. "Cheer up clown! You're supposed to look cheerful and approachable but darn! go get a red lipstick and draw more smiley shaped lips on your face" I said in my head. Oh, not to forget the 3 free movie tickets that we get just by buying 2 newspapers from one of the booths.
Well, actually if you buy 2 newspapers, you get 1 free ticket. But my 'never tried too hard to be charming' husband did get 2 free tickets from the girl who was selling the newspapers simply by asking "Dik, bagi 2 tiket boleh?" and that was it..2 free 7 Petala Cinta tickets handed onto his hand by the girl who was probably hoping that he would bend on his knees asking her to go watch the movie with him.Huh!! Hubby walked back to me grinning sheepishly with the face impression portraying "aku ade... kau ade?"
I straightened my body posture and walked towards the newspaper booth and asked the girl something about the promotion they were having which I already knew. But, overact friendliness added with over rehearsed effort seemed failing to melt the girl's heart to give me 1 extra ticket. Then, here came the back up plan; asking for sympathy part " Alaaa, boleh la dik, akak dengan anak ni (pointing to my 15 year old nephew), camane nak masuk kalau tiket 1?" With overconfident face she said " Sorryla kak, 1 je free tiket for 2 newspapers"
Now, the mood to watch 7 Petala Cinta was replaced with rase nak tala kepale budak tu 7,8 kali!
All in all, I would say the visit to the event was worth it as we did head home with 3 free movie tickets (to keep mummy and daddy happy :), 2 balloon swords ( to keep the 2 little pumpkins happy) now how about the birthday boy?? Well, he already got his birthday present a month ahead of his actual birth date, plus we did celebrate a merry join venture celebration the night before..
One more that I get to bring home was the horrible images of the portable or mobile toilet that keeps flashing in my mind every time I talk or think about this hot air balloon event. With a spanking modern, sleek and fancy looking building all around Putrajaya, they can do a lot better than providing disgusting portable toilet that surely failed to please and impress people who need the toilet urgently like myself. Investing in a proper toilet wouldn't cost too much would it? After all, this was an international event and what's the point of organising such big event if all visitors get to talk and remember was not the spanking looking high cost building but stinking smelling toilet! Duh!!
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| The 3 Ds |
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| some of the hot air balloons.. |
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| giant floating cake for bday boy :) |
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| dah kite x dpt naik hot air balloon tu, jom kite panah kasi bocor nak? |
Friday, March 9, 2012
Tuesday, March 6, 2012
Disastrous surprise indeed...
It's taken me more than two weeks before I finally post this entry about the series of unfortunate events happened lately...hmmm to start with it was my hubby's birthday on 18th Feb and a week prior to that I cracked my already messy head trying to figure out what plan should I do for him and I finally chose to prepare for in house candlelight dinner for 5 :) Wow!! For 5? You might ask...Well, I know if it's just me and him it would be more romantic but my idea is that I wanna try to include the kids as much as I could in our current life and have as many celebrations as we could together with them before they are big enough to have their own kind of party on their own in another part of the world and burn a hole hopefully in their pocket and not ours :D. By then most likely we'll be invisible yet memorable in their minds..So the idea of having a candlelight dinner for 5 wasn't too bad was it? Apart from the fact that something didn't turn out to be the way I had planned.
On the said day, we (me and the 3Ds) woke up early preparing the list of things we should do in order for the plan to success. First, we went hunting for ink cartridge refill for the printer and photo papers which is needed for my incomplete scrap book as his birthday present. Then, we headed to Tesco to do groceries shopping. To be honest, it was my first time trying to cook western meal and I had really big trouble choosing over tenderloin, sirloin, rib eye or whatever steak as I had no idea of what the differences were and due to time constrain I didn't bother to ask for advice or suggestion and perhaps kes buat2 pandai la nih :) Shopping list checked, we went back home and started preparing dinner.
The menu was Main Course; Dry Beef Steak (didn't have time to make the gravy or google for the gravy recipe), Side dish; Mashed Sweet Potatoes and Salads, Dessert; it's meant to be Non Bake Cheesecake but I think because I use the normal cream cheese rather than double cream cheese it became ice-cream like cheesecake but the taste I tell you was superb! It's just the consistency that went haywire.
The kids had fun helping me out mashing and bashing the sweet potatoes, mixing and stirring the cheesecake mixture and setting up the table. I guess it's the whole process that got them excited and looked forward for daddy's arrival so we could yell "Surprise and Happy Birthday!!" but unfortunately that didn't happen..
The kids fell asleep waiting for daddy and seeing that I was heartbroken.
When my husband finally arrived home, I was just glad that he arrived safely but I wasn't in the mood for any kinds of celebration. All I wanted to do was to get a sinful sleep after a long tiring day going here and there with three kids trailing behind me,beside me or maybe all around me..I couldn't even remember.
Awoken by the children's laughter the very next day, I came out from the bedroom seeing the children were already at the dining table waiting to enjoy the candlelight dinner turned sunshinelit breakfast. Joined by me and hubby they had a good time still talking about daddy's birthday. Boy!! What do these naive but curious children know?? My heart sank with happiness, sadness, disappointment, anger and gratefulness all at the same time. I knew I wasn't behaving strangely because as a human I'm pretty sure we'll be heartbroken if something didn't turn out the way we wanted it to be right? He had his own reason for being late, I had my own reason to be angry and disappointed while the children had their very own reason to still laugh and put a smile on their pretty faces just to have mum and dad around even though everything else in their world turned upside down.
Things done can't be undone and all that mattered was the fact that we had loved each other, still in love with each other and will always be, InsyaAllah.. I love keeping this in mind "In a relationship when we are stuck in an unavoidable and unfavorable situation or circumstances it's how we deal with it that makes the difference in the outcome". I needed time by myself for a little while to come back to my sensible mind and that's when I decided to have a journey to the center of my heart (Cewahh!!) and yes...still with three kids trailing behind, beside or all around me..I can't recall this too. Till then, here are some of the pics of that disastrous surprise ;D
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| dhani and alyssa's menu :) |
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| ours.. |
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| the non bake cheesecake turned ice-cream like cheesecake :) |
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| Yun yum! |
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| As you can see, no pictures of us enjoying the meal as we only ate the meal the next morning and by that time I wasn't in the mood to snap photos anymore :( ADIOS :) |
Tuesday, January 31, 2012
Wardrobe makeover needed!!
As I was in rush getting ready this morning, I stood still in front of my opened overloaded wardrobe for like 15 minutes and I still couldn't decide what to wear (even the journey to my daughter's school is only 5 minutes drive I can't be going in my PJs can I?) It's either all my clothes are outdated, not suitable or I can't fit in them anymore...Jeez!!
I'm pretty much of a person who prefers comfort than being a fashionista but then again I do like the good feeling you get when you dressed up nicely and comfortably. Most of the clothes I have in my wardrobe are those that I don't@ can't wear anymore even though I've thrown or given away like 5 big boxes of clothes in the last 3 months. Somehow I don't know where do I get all these piles of clothes either back in my wardrobe or on my son's bed hehe :) I guess that's the downside of having 4 elder sisters. Whatever they don't or can't wear will beautomatically handed down to me whether I like it or not which most of the time I accept voluntarily. My house is like the recycling centre for clothes...okay, okay..I'm exaggerating it a little bit here.
The main point I'm trying to tell here is, I keep wearing the clothes I like over and over because most of the clothes in my possession are not wearable. Even after some shopping, the same thing will happen over and over again and I don't know how to break the cycle. ( I do HOPE my hubby will read this entry..) How do I deal with this? I guess a total wardrobe makeover would cost me a fortune so I need to google and research more on what clothes are essentials or must haves in wardrobe and start to vary it from there. Malaysia's climate being warm and humid I might stick to the best birthday suit ever given to any mankind :D
And oooohhh... how I wish for walk in closet or wardrobe like these pictures...the one that I can hide in..In time of emergencies hehe ;-)
Thursday, January 12, 2012
Alive and breathing
Finally, after a long pause I'm back to pressing the play button on my blog which I think has got spiderwebs building up around it :D. Pardon me for the long and sincere silence as I was trying to keep up with all the good and challenging things been happening around me since we last talked.
The first thing I noticed when I signed in to my blog was how I actually hate my blog title. It sounds like an online lingerie store, Huh??!! So, right now I'm trying to figure out what my new blog title would be. Well, I might change it or might not so we'll see what happens...
A lot has happened in and out of my life throughout the last 5 months. Had to quit the job in Amex which I enjoyed as there were too many issues and conflicts arisen due to the job especially childcare and emotional aspect. So I'm finally back to 24/7 with my children and officially employed by them :) As of Jan 2012 I've started working full time together with my sister in her daycare centre KidQ but still my children are the main employer as of now. Working full time elsewhere is so not for me but working full time with my children around me? YES, a big yes to that. I'd say I can't cope not having them around me.
I know somehow, when they grow up, they'll be living their life, spreading their wings and exploring the world. So right now, I'm just gonna enjoy their company no matter how overwhelming it could get sometimes.
On top of that, me and my other half are planning to travel the world when we have enough saving (which we haven't even started yet honestly) and when the children know how to fend themselves. I can't be dragging them along when we travel as that will add up to the cost. Furthermore I want it to be Our time, me and my husband. Just us...but if we were too old by the time we have enough saving I might consider enrolling ourselves in a fancy Old Folks Home though.
A lot has happened last year. From international news like Prince William and Kate Middleton officially became lawfully husband and wife, a Tsunami rammed the coast of Japan, Gaddafi, Amy Winehouse, Steve Jobs and Elizabeth Taylor's death (to name a few), President Barack Obama announced US soldiers pullout from Iraq, Nicky Minaj topped Eminem with the most Twitter Followers to local news such as successful Bersih 2.0 Rally, Yuna's revoked Best Song award by AIM, confirmed use of inedible ink for coming General Election and Aileen Gabriella first Malaysian who won the Miss Tourism International World Pageant.
Most of all, the good news that came to start my new year 2012 was Anwar Ibrahim acquitted of sodomy charge which to me personally, it proved that justice still prevails over anything in this country and I'm so glad to know it.I feel blessed last year and won't stop hoping for more blessing this year and many more years to come Insyaallah.
The first thing I noticed when I signed in to my blog was how I actually hate my blog title. It sounds like an online lingerie store, Huh??!! So, right now I'm trying to figure out what my new blog title would be. Well, I might change it or might not so we'll see what happens...
A lot has happened in and out of my life throughout the last 5 months. Had to quit the job in Amex which I enjoyed as there were too many issues and conflicts arisen due to the job especially childcare and emotional aspect. So I'm finally back to 24/7 with my children and officially employed by them :) As of Jan 2012 I've started working full time together with my sister in her daycare centre KidQ but still my children are the main employer as of now. Working full time elsewhere is so not for me but working full time with my children around me? YES, a big yes to that. I'd say I can't cope not having them around me.
I know somehow, when they grow up, they'll be living their life, spreading their wings and exploring the world. So right now, I'm just gonna enjoy their company no matter how overwhelming it could get sometimes.
On top of that, me and my other half are planning to travel the world when we have enough saving (which we haven't even started yet honestly) and when the children know how to fend themselves. I can't be dragging them along when we travel as that will add up to the cost. Furthermore I want it to be Our time, me and my husband. Just us...but if we were too old by the time we have enough saving I might consider enrolling ourselves in a fancy Old Folks Home though.
A lot has happened last year. From international news like Prince William and Kate Middleton officially became lawfully husband and wife, a Tsunami rammed the coast of Japan, Gaddafi, Amy Winehouse, Steve Jobs and Elizabeth Taylor's death (to name a few), President Barack Obama announced US soldiers pullout from Iraq, Nicky Minaj topped Eminem with the most Twitter Followers to local news such as successful Bersih 2.0 Rally, Yuna's revoked Best Song award by AIM, confirmed use of inedible ink for coming General Election and Aileen Gabriella first Malaysian who won the Miss Tourism International World Pageant.
Most of all, the good news that came to start my new year 2012 was Anwar Ibrahim acquitted of sodomy charge which to me personally, it proved that justice still prevails over anything in this country and I'm so glad to know it.I feel blessed last year and won't stop hoping for more blessing this year and many more years to come Insyaallah.
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